A Heart-in-Hand Approach to Listening
She sat on a pillow by the window and sighed, looking around the room at the other women. “I’ll go first. It will be short. I’m sure I won’t take the whole time.” Layers of her story began to unfold as tangled emotions slowly unraveled. “Do these women really want to hear this? Why? It’s a mess. Will they judge? Is it safe?”
“Should I go on?” she said.
“Yes, please do.” I gently voiced, renewing my focus, quieting my own questions, and wanting more than anything for her to know that I really did care and that her heart was safe.
After about 30 minutes of focusing our minds and hearts on this woman’s story, we sat quietly amazed at what happened not only for her but for all of us in that small group. “Wow, I don’t think I have ever been listened to without interruption or someone trying to insert their own story. You really listened and accepted my story, accepted me,” she expressed with tears.
When was the last time you were loved in this way? When have you been able to give of yourself to someone else by truly listening? One of the most life-changing and soul-healing ministries we have is the beautiful gift of listening. When we talk about listening, we refer to the opening of one’s whole self to focus on, understand, and process emotions alongside one another.
A great deal has been written about developing the skills of active, reflective, and empathetic listening. Ultimately, these three skills must be paired with the sacrificial giving of one’s soul to listen openly and vulnerably.
There is a remarkable dynamic that forms when a group of hearts are all focused and engaged on the one sharing. Foundational to MTI’s training and care for cross-cultural workers is this kind of listening heart. We provide opportunities to gather in groups (both large and small), spend time in community, and reflect as a family or an individual. Our desire is that you leave knowing that you have been loved and have loved others well. Whether you are a 4-year-old or a senior, a participant or a visitor, we want you to experience what God does in a culture of full-hearted, focused listening.
How Did Jesus Listen?
We tend to focus on what Jesus said or did through His teachings and miracles while He was on earth. But I wonder, how did Jesus listen? Did He listen to their stories before He healed each one? Did He intently listen to every child who was brought to Him? Did He hold their stories with deep compassion? Is that what He talked to the Father about in His many times of solitude and prayer? What really made the difference for those He cared for - the healing of the body or the healing of the soul? Jesus made certain each one had been seen, heard, and held with a heart of empathy. Jesus’ transformative way of interacting with others truly highlights the importance of listening as a ministry. Our desire is to see this culture of listening lead to enriched relationships and Christ-centric conversations.